


His

by whoever_i_am



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Abusive John Winchester, Ficlet, Implied Sabriel, John Winchester Being an Asshole, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, M/M, referenced abuse, referenced homophobia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-02
Updated: 2015-02-02
Packaged: 2018-03-10 04:09:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3276164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whoever_i_am/pseuds/whoever_i_am
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A tiny destiel ficlet. Probably chronologically inaccurate, maybe a bit OOC- sorry. Set very early in the series.</p>
            </blockquote>





	His

He can't do this anymore. It's time for Dean to make a choice. He's not going to live like this anymore. Can he even call it living? "Dean." Cas' voice is soft but Dean still hears him, even from all the way across the room. 

"Mmhm?" Dean doesn't look up from his father's journal, but he appears to be listening. 

That journal. 

Cas hates that journal, and Cas isn’t someone who uses the word hate lightly. He hates that journal, and he really hates John Winchester. He hates him for what he did to Dean, for making Dean feel like a constant failure, a constant disappointment. Damaged. John Winchester damaged Dean, and Cas hates that.

"I'm leaving." Cas keeps his sentence short, afraid his voice will crack if he speaks for too long. 

This time, Dean does look up. His sparkling green eyes fill with concern, and, maybe something else? "What do you mean, you're leaving? Cas,-"

"I can't do this." Cas says. He looks straight at Dean. Well, perhaps that's not the best was to put it; as if anything he's ever thought about Dean has been straight. "We..We both know that, were I in a female vessel, we would have been dating long ago.”

Shock flashes in Dean's eyes for second as what Cas has said registers in his eyes. "Cas..." Dean says again, and for once Cas wishes he would just finish his sentence! Words race around Cas' brain but none of them fit, none of them are the right thing to say. So he just..walks away.

Right before he gets to the door, he feels a tap on his shoulder.

"Cas, you know who I am. You know what, what I'm like." Dean takes a deep breath. "You know what my dad was like.” Cas’ hatred boils up again, and he’s a viable mess of emotions, all full of anger and sadness and love and jealousy. “How do you think he reacted when he found out his oldest son was gay?”

Cas does a double take. Surely he must have misheard Dean.

“I know I’m messed up and I know it’s because of him but I don’t care anymore, Cas, I don't care what vessel you're in, I still love you. It doesn't matter to me." 

Cas doesn't believe his ears. He must be hallucinating, imagining this. Perhaps this is his own personal hell, and in a minute Dean will tell him he’s just kidding, that no one could ever love him.

And then Dean kisses him, and he knows it's real, and he's happier than he's ever felt before. Now Dean is his.

Dean. Broken, damaged Dean. 

His Dean. 

\--------------

In the kitchen, Sam quietly dials his cell phone, making sure not to disturb them.

“Hello?” Gabriel’s voice answers.

“It’s me, Sam. Get this: I was right. They kissed. You owe me twenty bucks.” 

Gabriel laughs. “Sam, you know there are better ways I can repay you.”


End file.
